Let’s see if I remember how to do this. I suppose it has been too long since I have attempted this feat of extraordinary, well let’s just call it, an effort. Yeah, you’re probably right, that might be over simplifying everything. Either way, I am still not so sure I can pull this off in a way that will be satisfying to you the reader or me the one that has to put it here for you to read. One thing that doesn’t seem to be too different, my fingers remember how to work together on the keyboard. That one fact alone defies all logic considering they usually are doing hunt and peck when making doing other things here on the laptop or as I affectionately call it Lappy IV or is it V I lost track somewhere. Not sure that I matters although I guess it would be easier if I would just pick another name for each one, but where would the fun in that be? I seem to be avoiding the whole purpose of this attempt at writing. Maybe I should just get to the point that is if there is in fact a point to this. Knowing me it isn’t anything to world shaking anyway, but you never know.
It seems to me that we should just stop for the day and remember what it’s all about. I guess you could say this exact thing about any holiday. After all why have a holiday if not to reflect on the reason we have it in the first place. What I don’t understand our need to rename things to fit something we feel it needs to be, or because we don’t want to call it what it really is. I know that we’ve changed, and our world is different and people are, well you know how they are, I don’t think I have to remind anyone of that. Years ago I wrote about a man I met that told me he didn’t celebrate Thanksgiving because it was too religious. I know there are many reasons not to celebrate something in life, and yes religion has been the reasons to, and not to celebrate them. As I told him that this is one of those that can go either way. I pointed out that the so called “Pilgrims” were a religious bunch, but still that was no reason to think you could not still enjoy the day in celebration. While again yes they thanked God for the harvest and for their deliverance to the new world and the fact that they doubtfully would not starve to death as many had the previous year. They were also thinking the local tribes for their help and knowledge of farming the land; as it was a bit different there than it was back home. Their first year of crops stood a strong testament to that, which is a big reason many starved to death the year before the first thanksgiving. And here is why I think it is ridiculous for anyone to call and celebrate this as “Friendsgiving” like really. I get it we celebrating with friends and all but just who they hell do you think was at the first thanksgiving. Let me give you a clue they were all; well we’d like to think they were all friends. Oh I am sure, that’s why I said it the way I did, there were a few in there that held some grudge or other or just flat out didn’t like someone or family that was there. But, as we are told, they were all there. At the very least they were all invited and contributed something to that feast whether or not they came well that has been lost to history. We know the local tribe was represented at the very least so we can be sure it wasn’t just family there. There were friends there to be sure but still they called it a thanksgiving or a giving of thanks if you will.
Wonder of wonders, I guess what I am struggling with is why call it that? Why friends, are we giving friends and if so what or who are we giving them? I mean aren’t we still giving thanks for something. At least I would think. Has this craze of naming and changing meaning of things really that important? I certainly hope not. Will anyone want to rename Christmas to fat man in red suit day? Perhaps gifting day would be more suitable for the triggered in life, or more simply Gifting Day. Wait what will we have to call birthdays if we use gifting day for that, born on day, or maybe age day. Wouldn’t that be fun if we just started renaming everything, oh wait; they kind of are aren’t they. That I suppose is for another time.
All that being said I am reminded of many times in my life when all I had around me at this time of year were the friends I had made. My life at the time being a few thousand miles away from most of my family. We would have thanksgiving dinner together, celebrate the giving of thanks and enjoy the day. We didn’t call it anything different, we didn’t always eat hat one might even call a traditional dinner even. Then again why should what was eaten change the meaning of it. Oh sure you might argue that calling it something different doesn’t change the meaning of it either, but you’d be wrong. The idea of the celebration is in its name. Thanksgiving, the giving of thanks is essential to what the day is! Whew, right. Okay so maybe I am being a bit sensitive, one might call it triggered, I hate that word. I didn’t call it that, but one might, and I know who you are too. That means you can’t get away with it, I won’t let you. I can’t say enough about this either, but I will try not to make this sound bad. Better yet just stop trying to call it something it’s not. If you sit down on the same day and in most cases the same reason, a giving of thanks, do you really need to be with only family or with any of your family for that matter. No, you don’t. It’s that simple people. Would we call having a cook out in the middle of summer friendsgiving too? No, we would not and do not. Maybe what they want us to see is that family isn’t important? Meh, could be. Don’t we or maybe aren’t we still thankful for the friends around us? Are we in fact giving thanks for the friends we have with us on this day? Yes, you’re right, we are. At least I hope we are. Were the Pilgrims thankful for their new friends? Don’t you think that’s why they were invited? Don’t you think that’s why they came? I certainly hope so. We know that not everyone that came to that first thanksgiving were always friends and were definitely not all friends they had known from back home. Sure the friendship with the local tribes were tenuous at times and relied on many factors but still they were as we were told friends or at least friendly maybe frienemies, but either way. I think you see where I am going. I sure hope you’ve been able to follow this. If not I am, well, screwed, or out of luck, or maybe crazy. Just don’t tell me which one you think I am just yet, let me finish first.
I remember many of my families thanksgivings from my past. They are all gone now, but those memories will remain with me until I am no longer here, mentally or physically. The things we ate the people that would be there one year and not another. Fifteen twenty people for dinner might not have been normal for us but we would fill up our dinning room with no trouble, no matter the year. I don’t think we always had family friends to eat with us but growing up I know there were some and I know my grandparents would plop in an extra leaf in the table should one or more come. Some of my favorite memories of thanksgiving are with my Grandfather at the end of the table with his oyster casserole close at hand making sure we tried it. It was interesting to say the least and I kind of liked it to be honest, and I kind of miss it too. As I grew older I learned that people enjoyed inviting their friends to eat with them on Thanksgiving. I was on occasion even invited to other peoples homes on this day. Being the introvert that I am I don’t remember actually attending any other than my family dinners. That is until I moved my happy ass three thousand miles away. Then I didn’t really have much choice. Okay I did have an Aunt and Uncle and some cousins a half sister and a donor out there too. Sure I spent a few dinners with them but you have to realize they, other than my aunt, and uncle, and cousins, were strangers to me. One can argue all they want, but they were still family. Okay yes maybe they were but I did meet people out there and yes I spent thanksgiving with them. Eating and giving thanks for the day, what we had, what was good in our lives, the fact that we had friends to be with and eat until we couldn’t move, just like the first thanksgiving had. Now unlike our ancestors at that first thanksgiving I suppose we were also thankful it didn’t last three days like theirs did. Oh my goodness right, can you imagine that today. The beer the turkey, the ham, the venison, and various other animals I am quite sure. The corn, the potatoes, the other stuff they had, pies, cakes, puddings. I just can’t think of everything they probably had. I am fairly sure by now you see where this is all going. If not I have done a poor job at this and you may be right. This kind of feels a bit more like a the hell you say rant than anything else. See what I did there. I hope you don’t truly mind that it is as this sound a bit more dark than the lighthearted essays in the past. Given time I can get back to those, if I do more.
It seems I have rambled on a bit. I am beginning to wonder how many got lost back at the drug store. No, don’t go back and see if I mentioned a drug store; I didn’t, until now that is. I think I will finish, just so I don’t lose anyone at the fork in the turkey. I can’t think of just how to close this so I will do it the same as I ended these in the past.
So to you my friends and family and family of friends I give you this day, whatever you choose to call it, so that you may over eat, over drink, and over indulge. Remember this day and keep it sacred to you and your circle no matter they be family or friends or family of friends. Remember those that no longer sit at our tables, that for them you also give thanks that they are or were in your life. Do not let your heart grow heavy on this day for it is a time to be thankful for what we have in our lives, the food we eat, the friends we have and the family we are forced to know. Enjoy it for all it has to offer knowing one day we may not be so lucky as to have friends or family to be thankful for. In the end just be thankful as this is the day for it that no one can take from you for doing so.
From The Strange Mind of Me 